August 3, 2007, the last time the kitchen floor was safe for sucking on
I’m feeling conflicted about blogging right now so I’m just going to write for a few minutes and hope I can re-connect with a few of you.
1. Real vs. Ideal: The schedule I posted below is all well and good except when it isn’t, which is just about every day. Here’s how it really works: I am so worn out from my mega-shifts and the fact that sometimes the guys at work don’t go to bed at a reasonable hour, and when they do I still have a couple hours of paperwork and cleaning/laundry to do even when they do, that the first couple of days home I am loving my bed way too much to give up the Snapper’s first nap to any kind of housework, which means that I end up having a very rushed shower before I take him to daycare and am generally more frazzled by the time I hit the books (see post below for discussion of generalized dissertation disorder). This also means I am not exercising, which is making my overall energy and productivity plummet and my diet go in the toilet, too. I have decided not to try to lose any more weight until things are more stable, which is OK because I am at pre-pregnancy, and though it’s not my ideal healthy weight I have almost no body image problem for the first time in my life (weird. why did this happen?), so the issue is exercise more than anything for how I feel. Anyway, all this means that the house is filthy. At this point my poor understimulated son is only getting to play in one room in the house because the others are either too dirty or too cluttered to be safe–I am not an overly protective mother so this is saying an awful lot–and he is a very adventurous little monster. We need some solutions for housework and cooking that can accommodate a law school workload, a dissertation, a physically demanding full-time job and an active baby. This is where I tell you that I am open to any and all advice you may have. The good news is that we’re not fighting over it (miracle of all miracles!). The bad news is that it’s still not getting done.
2. I am missing this adoption conference in my former home city and am incredibly bummed especially to miss meeting some of you IRL who will be there. Did I mention how disappointed I am? Is it becoming obvious how disconnected I still feel in this new place?
3. Hello, Richard! I am so sorry I keep not emailing you. You leave nice comments on my blog and even did my meme. I am a bad friend. I have no excuse but for fatal personality flaws that I am trying to overcome.
4. I am frightened for Burma and wishing that it would become a national priority. It’s #4 on my own list, for pete’s sake. It’s not okay to kill anyone of any social status, but when we start killing monks we have ignored warning signs for far too long. Yes, I said we! Now’s a good time to watch Romero, or to re-watch it if you haven’t in a while. Get fired up for peace–people are dying.